Up Close and (un)Conventional – Unrealistic Expectations?
Welcome to this week’s Up Close and (un)Conventional. This is where I discuss both things that have to do with reading and blogging, and things that just have to do with life in general. This week, I’m discussing unrealistic expectations and what can happen if we take romance novels literally… A while back, a friend of mine on Facebook had a status message saying that romance novels made women have as unrealistic expectations to relationships as porn movies made men have… And I found that to be a very interesting, albeit not completely correct assertion.
I love reading romance, and you know that if you have ever visited me before. I love reading about a couple who meet for the first time, those fluttering feelings, the chemistry, the first kiss, the first smexy scenes, and then, how they grow to truly care for each other. And of course, the sex is always close to perfect in romance novels. The guy (yeah, I’m talking M/F today – sorry!) always manages to make sure everything is good for the woman before he goes on to truly participate fully and let himself go. You know what I mean? And so, yeah, I guess my FB friend was correct, if we expect a guy to always take care of us first, and then continue to make love to us for hours and make us come numerous times before he comes, yeah. Then I’d say we’d have unrealistic expectations when it comes to lovemaking and sex. I think we all know it’s fiction though – it’s fairytales for grown-ups. The princess gets the prince, lots of orgasms and then lives happily ever after.
And of course, the guy is always muscular, handsome, strong (both mentally and phyiscally!) and he’s tender with a big heart. He manages to understand the gal’s cues without any trouble at all, both the verbal and the non-verbal ones. He’s rich enough to be able to romance her in all possible ways, from romantic trips to exotic restaurants and everything in between 😉 And the heroine is always ready for an adventure with him, to go on a helicopter ride for a dinner across the country, to go skiing down a mountain (even if she’s never skied before) or to go to a galla dinner after the opera 😉
Now, I’m not one to watch porn, so I can’t say too much specific about it – apart from the fact that I think most guys are also realistic enough to realize that what happens in a movie is make believe as well. And that actors and actresses who may or may not have had some help when it comes to their physique is not what they’ll have in bed with them when they meet with a woman and manage to take it to the next step. So, while I may not fully agree with my friend, he definitely made me think! Because I can’t neglect the fact that sometimes, after reading a particularly steamy scene in one of my romances, I may or may not want to jump my husband. And maybe see if something new could happen… but without having overly unrealistic expectations about the outcome – because we will always be just us 😉
What about you? do you think romances have made you have unrealistic expectations when it comes to romantic relationships in the real world?