*I received a free copy of Firsts from St. Martin's Griffin via Netgalley. This has in no way influenced my voluntary review, which is honest and unbiased *
Warning: This book includes mature content such as: sexual content, and/or drug and/or alcohol use, and/or violence.
Firsts Published by St. Martin's Griffin on 5 January 2016 Genres: Contemporary, Young Adult
Pages: 320
Format: eARC
Source: Netgalley
Seventeen-year-old Mercedes Ayres has an open-door policy when it comes to her bedroom, but only if the guy fulfills a specific criteria: he has to be a virgin. Mercedes lets the boys get their awkward, fumbling first times over with, and all she asks in return is that they give their girlfriends the perfect first time- the kind Mercedes never had herself.
Keeping what goes on in her bedroom a secret has been easy- so far. Her absentee mother isn’t home nearly enough to know about Mercedes’ extracurricular activities, and her uber-religious best friend, Angela, won’t even say the word “sex” until she gets married. But Mercedes doesn’t bank on Angela’s boyfriend finding out about her services and wanting a turn- or on Zach, who likes her for who she is instead of what she can do in bed.
When Mercedes’ perfect system falls apart, she has to find a way to salvage her reputation and figure out where her heart really belongs in the process. Funny, smart, and true-to-life, FIRSTS is a one-of-a-kind young adult novel about growing up.
Firsts is an emotional read, told from Mercedes’ point of view. Mercy keeps everyone she knows at arms’ length, and wants to be in control. As the story unfolds, it becomes very clear why that is, and my heart broke for her. The ending was a little ‘too easy’ for me, wrapped up too nicely for such a dark and gritty story.
Mercy’s story in Firsts is one of an abandoned teen, where after her father left, her mother more or less checked out, and she was left to tend for herself with the strangest parental guidance I have ever read about. Kim, Mercy’s mom, was more interested in how Mercy dressed – for success with the boys – than anything else. And for Mercy, control was very important, as was keeping her friends away from all her troubles. And as the story unfolds, the trauma of Mercy’s past slowly comes to light, explaining in many ways why she had taken the decision to help virgin boys from her school to be somewhat experienced so that their first time with their virgin girlfriends could be as close to perfect as possible.
Because she was so smart when it came to everything that had to do with school, tutoring other kids in chemistry or physics, Mercy had broadened her horizons when she realized there was a way for her to help in other ways as well. And apart from her best friend, Angela, she hasn’t let anyone close to her in a long time. Between prayer group and her extracurricular activities, she’s a busy girl, and the way Kim is only in the periphery made me want to slap her to have her wake up and really get to know her troubled daughter. Firsts is about much more than the sex, though, it is about friendship and finding oneself, and I think that this was the hardest part for Mercy. Thinking about the past, letting people in, and trying to construct her future was like a puzzle with missing pieces for her.
Writing about sex in YA is never easy, and having the main female character sleep with different guys to help them be good for their boyfriends was an angle I hadn’t seen before I picked up Firsts. I really loved that there was no judging, and also that Mercy always made sure that only safe sex was happening, as she had a wide variety of condoms to go with her ‘teaching’. The only guy she slept with more than once was Zach, and while he wanted nothing more than being her boyfriend, he let her keep him at arms length in the hope that she would come to her senses at a later time.
Firsts is a complicated story, where Mercy is afraid of being found out, but she can’t make herself stop helping just one more guy. So between the fear of being exposed and the need for validation, her tight-rope becomes tighter as the story moves forward. Written in first person present tense, the I felt like I was right there with Mercy, and the only hope I had was that no matter where the chips fell in the end, she would come out on the other side still being strong, and with a more accomplished feeling of self.
I wish there was a way I could take the Watcher off my list, but that’s the thing about sex. Once it happens, it can’t unhappen.
What I couldn’t tell him was that I wanted, for some desperate reason, for Jillian’s first time to be what mine never was. Jillian was everything I wasn’t – pure, innocent, and unaware of how much pain the opposite sex could inflict, physically and emotionally. I wanted her to stay unaware.
I really feel for guys. They have the hard part, physically and emotionally. Virginity is supposed to be something a girl gives up only when she is ready and feels comfortable, something a girl discusses at length with her friends and flip-flops over a million times in her mind before actually doing it. A guy is expected to be born ready.
Reading this book contributed to these challenges:
About Linda @ (un)Conventional Bookworms
Linda is an English as foreign language teacher and has a Master's degree in English Language and Literature. She's an avid reader, blogger, compulsive one-clicker and a genre omnivore. Ever since she learnt how to read she has been seen with a book or two in her hands everywhere she goes.
I saw a revuew about this one yesterday but I can’t remember if it was a good one or not but in any case I’m glad you had a great time with it yourself.
I thought it was really well done, Melliane, and especially because the reasons why Mercy was doing what she did made me feel for her.
I have seen a lot of mixed reviews for this one. It seems that people either really like it or don’t care for it at all. I am really glad that it worked well for you. I am not sure if it would be the right book for me or not. Great review!
Yeah, I’ve seen as many one-star ratings for this as I have seen four-stars, Carole. I do get what those who hated it mean, but it just didn’t seem the same way to me when I read it 🙂 Thanks for stopping by.
Twitter: kbaby81
I was so conflicted in the beginning, but I slowly let myself see everything for what it was; control. After reading more and more about Mercy’s past, I see why she’s the way she is. There are things that I certainly don’t agree with, but I can’t deny that I liked the story as a whole. Flynn has some big cojones to tackle a story like this. Kudos to her!
I agree, writing a YA novel in which the female lead has a lot of sex takes a lot of courage, and actually doing so without judgement is genius! There are things I don’t agree with either, but I could definitely see where Mercy was coming from.
This story sounds right up my alley. I read another review about it and that blogger didn’t like it that much. But I do like the book’s open approach to sex, which is refreshing particularly in YA.
I agree, sex in YA books is important, and one thing I have to say is that Mercy took safe sex very seriously! I’ve seen several bloggers who didn’t care for it either, but I enjoyed it. I hope you will, too!
I saw this one a while back on netgalley and was tempted to request it because of the original premise. And now I am a bit sad I didn’t as it sounds like a book I would enjoy.
I am glad to hear you enjoyed this book even though the ending was a bit too easy, it sounds like a great and emotional read besides that. It sounds interesting how you slowly learn more of her past and why she decided to help virgin boys out. I think it’s great the author decided to write so openly about sex in a ya book and took such an original angle to the topic. Great review!
It was definitely emotional, Lola, and the way Mercy used sex to control her own life was well done. I hope you’ll decide to pick it up, even if you didn’t request the ARC.
yeah this is very different, I am going to read this next, I think the subject matter for books like this is hard to tackle.
It’s definitely a tough subject to touch on, and I really enjoyed that the author was able to write this story without sounding judgey at all. That was well done 🙂
I wasn’t sure about this one but I have been seeing so many great reviews! I think it sounds like it tackles sex in a very open way which is great. Great review!
It does tackle sex in an open way, and the fact that what is going on with Mercy isn’t really conventional made the story interesting and different.
YAY, I’m so glad that you adored this book, Lexxie! I’ve been wanting to read this book since forever now – the reviews have gotten me really interested because it seems to be a rather controversial book. I was initially put off by the synopsis – I mean this girl just sleeps with other girls’s boyfriends? Whaaat? BUt I am willing to give this a go.
Lovely review, hun <33
Yes, she does, Melanie! But she doesn’t do it to ‘steal’ the boys away from those girls. And while it’s still very unconventional, in a strange way, I came to really understand why she did what she did… Which is petty weird! I don’t like cheaters, and I don’t like it when a girl goes after a guy she knows has a girlfriend… but it really was very different in Firsts. I hope you’ll enjoy it as well.
Aw, all I’ve heard are great things about this book! I love how the author brings up the awareness for birth control and safe sex in this topic, as well as the focus on sex (which is a pretty new take in YA). I’m definitely picking this one up and seeing how Mercy works everything well. Lovely review!
Great review!!! I’m glad you enjoyed it because I need to pick it up now. Thanks so much for sharing!